From the moment we are born, we are told what to eat, when to sleep, what to learn, and how to play. We are conditioned from the beginning to be on others schedules and abide by their rules. Now, this isn’t exactly a bad thing, given that society would crumble without any structure at all; but it often holds the potential to create a pattern in which people are designed to be more complacent in their discomfort, and give more fucks than needed in day to day life.
Too often these days, working adults are overwhelmed, overworked and way under paid for the amount of fucks they’re putting in, just to live their lives. Do this job, stay later for this project, help this friend move to another city on your only free Saturday- the list is endless! Not to mention the amount of Self Help book purchases on the rise, to get out of the rat race and onto the golden, sandy beaches of bliss. And yet the secret to it all, is to not give a single fuck to shit that doesn’t serve you.
I know that it’s better said than done, but seriously not giving a fuck on the day to day irrelevancies that fly your way, will save you a shit ton of time, energy and headaches.
This is not to say that giving less of a fuck in every sense is important. Some things you have to give a fuck about (ie, bills and shit). But that passive aggressive comment a bitch named Karen said in the grocery store about your choice of nut milk, is not worth the fuck.
Your peace of mind in the chaos of life is not worth the unnecessary burden of carrying someone else’s opinion or negativity, that doesn’t involve you. In order to be successful and happy in life, it is important to remember that you are responsible for your own self worth and fulfillment. It is not another’s job to do this for you, so be careful in how you speak to yourself and allow others to speak to you.
Sarah Knight, the author of “The Life Changing Magic of Not Giving A Fuck” trademarked the idea of having ‘fuck bucks‘, which simplified is a way to think of your daily fucks as a budget of “time, energy, and money.” This idea of fuck bucks brilliantly promotes and reinforces the notion that we all have autonomy over our energy reserve, all the time.
Take for example, your supervisor needs a deadline met by noon, but you also have to help set up for a coworker’s surprise birthday party, that you don't even like. A person without boundaries or awareness of where they spend their fucks, will try to do both and later be burnt out and cranky. But the person who simply declines to helping with the party, will have saved their fucks for shit they actually enjoy. Remember, you are in control of every fuck you give.
Simple tips to not giving a fuck:
- Saying “no” is not rude, it’s a boundary. How said boundary is received is not your fucking problem.
- Saying sorry for not attending an event that you don't wish to go to when you don't mean it, is often more hurtful and completely unnecessary. Politely make your point to why you can't make the event and move on.
- Remember that when someone is negative or mean towards you, it’s just a projection of their own insecurities acting out in front of you. Instead of giving a shit about what they said to you, try to find empathy for their inner hardship, and keep it moving. Now you have saved an extra fuck buck for more important matters in your life.
- If a person is not fulfilling your life, paying your bills, feeding you or making you cum, you are not obligated to give a fuck about their opinion.
At the end of the day, you are responsible for living this life how you want. Make the best of it, and spend your fucks with the things that boost your happiness in life.